You'd think a human being would have more respect for himself than to scrub his intestinal lining with $2.99 worth of minty rope. Then you see the ball sac growing on his chin and it all makes sense.
19 inch dildo? Butthole brutality? The lion's share of our viewers have already clicked before noticing the egg sac hanging between the legs. Blame yourselves.
Strange how the cameraman struts around with no reaction. As if finding a hog-tied girl nearing death is normal outside of the middle east.
Is it male? Is it female? I don't know, but it when it doesn't meet it's protein macro for the day you better run for the mother fuckin hills. Awwww shit.
I hope you feel guilty for masturbating to this.
Men usually follow a certain etiquette when it comes to public fornication. Alleyways, libraries, P.F. Chang dumpsters... but not this Adonis. He goes full throttle in government building foyers.
Forget the fact that his belly button gets more ass than his dick but how exactly does one know he has an erection when he has the stomach of Fred Dukes?
Really not sure who's to blame here. Burger King's dollar menu or Mexico.
Work your way up from the bottom they said. You'll have fun they said.
We can not guarantee you won't get a genital disease by watching this from beginning to end.
And they say the porn biz is in a downward spiral?
Who the fuck crowdfunded a RL version of Squidbillies?
There's no coming back from something like this. That egg sac will permanently be damaged goods. But on the bright side he's a shoe-in for the training montage stunt double in Rocky 7: Rise of the Nursing Home.
Set it on fire now before it lays eggs.
I have two stances I'm firm on when it comes to my sexy times. And the primary one clearly states no outdoing me on the bench. I'm tagging out of this one.
Effort in amateur porn? It's a lost art form for sure. That is unless you're sharing a double wide trailer with this guy in the backwoods of Nebraska. He's got game.
She's got the sphincter control of a geriatric with low fiber intakes. Diapers, and a new fucking hobby should be in the very-near future.
Send her love and/hate/pictures of your dick HERE.
My main man T-Bone's tolerance for food-fetish porn lasts about as long as Whoopi Goldberg on a low-fat diet. So if you can pinpoint the moment he regrets signing up for "Hot Dongs 3", let us know.
Many a time I have said "I've now seen everything amateur porn can throw my way" but this time I'm being literally. Vladimir is double dipping like a BAWS.
A bidet made out of another person's cornhole? I'm not saying I'd try it... but it's reverse engineering like this Bill Nye always taught me about.
Cute face and awesome body for sure. She could probably pass for model in Bulgaria. Unfortunately her turn-ons include sporting equipment and her turd slicer... and homey don't play that.
I really don't know shit about these Real Dolls, other that they are the preferred girlfriend material for guys named Chester. But today is all about education.
Proof that the all-dumbass diet doesn't really cut the fat.
Beverly Hills Slop: "Eddie Murphy has let himself go since the 80's"
Congratulations east Asia: You've truly perfected the art of making me question cute girls. TINDER stalking will never be the same.
There's an infinite amount of ways to get a guy rock solid and subsequently, drain the egg sac. THIS SHOULD NEVER BE ONE OF THEM.
Ever try looking for a love in Chernobyl? I imagine it always ends in something like this.
Can't imagine what kind of man she's gonna attract with that wallpaper on her cheek. Does it still count as hooking up if the dude is blind?
Might be time to return this one. She looks defective.
Dammit white people, I thought we had an understanding?
I'm not sure what in the blue fuck a man has to go through in life to look at field goaling his egg sac as a pleasurable thing... and I hope it stays that way. Fuck.
You just recovered from a back alley tit surgery that left your nipples looking like Steve Buscemi. Is this REALLY the time to be instructing guys to jerk off?
I've seen this douche in a few videos now. Always the same situation: He pretends to show off a bizarre talent, but in reality he's just trying to get unbanned from BodyBuilding.com's forums. Ballin.