We might have to lend our "Home of the Brave" slogan over to east Asia for the time being. It takes clinical levels of courage to keep a straight face in front of wine-spitting nipple.
Being hung like a piece of asparagus is one thing that doesn't belong on video. Sipping down Mimosas with a hunk of ball butter on your face is another.
This trifecta of social misfits are making a name for themselves, not in the lumber section of Home Depot, but in a dark corner of the net we call "The Danger Zone".
Adult-sized Halloween costume, BBW, and an occasional ass slap weaker than the walls of Kim Kardashian's uterus. I haven't seen this level of interspecies breeding since Alien 3.
Think YOUR Saturdays are fun? Time to reevaluate, Blanco Nino. This girl is into things that create sub-genres in the world of fetish porn. And that ain't easy.
If you thought for a second her bullshit $20k Total Recall surgery was legit, then let us go ahead and compliment you on your new iPhone 6 + and Big Bang Theory knowledge. Hand-in-hand autism my friend.
Devry Institute dropout turns to a world of art. The problem? All material must pass through a cornhole that's been through a woodchipper at least once. Not even Dog the Bounty hunter would touch that thing.
These girls are the Napoleon Dynamite of voyeur stars, so before you set your boner to attack mode just keep that in mind. Otherwise stain those pantaloons.
This might as well be considered a step-up from finger banging the XL bottle of Pert Plus (Costco baby) but not quite the brag-worthy achievement to tell the bros. w/e still busted.
Nice tits. Firm body. But what really sold me was her ability to throw a right hook. So spot-on you'd almost think Mayweather was training her in between hating white people.
Mark my words: Being an attention whore is going to bite this one in the ass. How about next year you stick to the vegan smoothies and Bob Ross haircuts, and save the "lifting" for likeigiveafuck.com.
An outgoing personality can redeem just about anything - broken teeth, bad hygiene, listening to Steely Dan. But THIS girl... she's got sexual fantasies that put white trash to shame. Do I jack off or call FEMA?
Haven't seen that lovely pair of hangers around these parts in a while. It's good to know Dillion Harper is still using those babies for the power of good.
Most of you have already unzipped and clicked. Kudos. But for the more reserved masturbator that reads this: I hope you're into condiments, cuz girl is packin.
And I use the word "girl" as loosely as possible. But not quite as loose as the hanging ham between Sideshow Bob's botched vaginoplasty. Never let it breed.
12 pornstars gathered for the "Stop AIDS!" campaign, which attracts thousands of people and encourages them to squeeze a pair of breasts to raise awareness.
I'm all for girls expelling enough fluids to repair the drought in California, but seriously, if she keeps applying this much pressure to her genitals it's going to be juego terminado before her 30's.
Her labia majora looks like 2 pieces of applewood smoked bacon. So she ponies up the cash and pays Apu to hack her lips back to virgin-status. #modernscience
There's gotta be a good reason this girl enjoys a bronzed version of Cung Le going up her asshole. $20.00 to the person who can figure out what that is.
You'd think a human being would have more respect for himself than to scrub his intestinal lining with $2.99 worth of minty rope. Then you see the ball sac growing on his chin and it all makes sense.
19 inch dildo? Butthole brutality? The lion's share of our viewers have already clicked before noticing the egg sac hanging between the legs. Blame yourselves.
