Half a minute into this you'll realize this is all just a very violent (and effective) way for one them to explore their lesbian curiosity.

Come on guys, save it for your anniversaries, weddings and girlfriend's birthdays.

Well... almost. But he's only a curb and two swastika tattoos away from making the complete transformation.

Jamal and company spend another Monday afternoon all dressed up and nowhere to go but the street corner. Entertainment isn't gonna make itself.

When later asked concussion-related questions, he replied that it's the year dog and his name is Blue. Kinda close.

Yeah... not really up to par with the normal conflict of race relations featured on this fine site. Hopefully Beyonce kicks Taylor Swift in the pussy tomorrow to make up for it.

Russians are finally starting to show a little compassion. No really, they let her keep her teeth this time.

One of the attackers was black, and the victim was white. So surely this at least makes up for a little bit of the slavery thing.

So where did this happen... a job fair?

This is probably why no Disney movie takes place in New Jersey.

At least it wasn't as bad as what I did to my girlfriend when she ate my last toaster strudel. Actually, she still hasn't found her way out of that freezer and that was 2 weeks ago.

Next time your friend complains about a hangover headache, show him this. Then elbow drop him in the face and send us the video.

Not even at McDonald's, land of the migrant beatdowns, did this guy stand a chance. You lose Oliver.

Rule #17 of fighting in the hood: If you're going to earn yourself some street cred, do it on a girl that knows what punching is. This is just awful.

The slower they are, the easier it is to tattoo a Nike logo to their forehead.

Don't worry. She survived and will be back to turning you cutting her in the line at McDonald's into a national tragedy in no time at all.

Defending yourself properly isn't for everyone. Getting turned into a concrete pancake in the Motherland however, is completely universal and applies to man and woman alike.

If you don't think lifting 3 bottles of weave shine and a copy of Jet magazine is worth this kind of beating, then you obviously haven't dated a real black girl. And have zero faith in the name Shantaquesha Jenkins.

Don't judge him though. I'm sure they're both very nice people when they aren't on PCP laced cocaine.