"WHO GOT A PHONE, NIGGA DIS SHIT IS A IPOD!!!" Quote of the month right here.

As fate would have it, Darwinism is alive and well. And owns 14 different pairs of UGG boots.

And we can't even blame this one on a Taylor Swift song. Way to bring down the average, fuckers.

Just make him eat the food. That's more damage than your bromaster biceps could ever dream of doing.

The same way you make a sleeping girlfriend better. Lots of electricity.

I'm not sure what this is about, but I think the skinny one is pissed off that the toilet seat was left up again.

OrionRed: "The NRA should use this as a promotional video. Without guns, you're left to defend yourself with chairs, brooms and buckets of lukewarm water. "

Notice the blood dripping from Tawny-Lynn's arm after this goliath gets a good slash on her. That's a mother fucking hazmat situation waiting to happen.

Hot.

Today's lesson: Spanish people do not, in fact, bleed Mop and Glow. #mythbusted

Compassion isn't one of Russia's strong points.

We'd warn you with the words "brutal" and "shocking"... but when the fuck has that ever stopped you?

The first situation makes a lot of sense. The second could have been a lot worse. In the butthole region.

Apparently the lone ranger here is using a gas gun. Not entirely sure what that is, but I'm pretty certain my bunghole after a crunchy gordita bowl is just as lethal at close range.

Consider this a victory for both Internet users and the gene pool alike.

She survived. But if she doesn't learn how to keep an eye on defenders she's never going to break Deion Sanders' rushing record.

Judging by his half assed attempt at threatening people with a weapon, I'd say the cosmetology school application process is getting pretty hard.

Most guys equipped with nothing more than a knife and pure adrenaline get what they want. This genius dared to be different.