Dudes living the American dream and your penis is a witness too it. Not the pancake syrup bath with a Guatemalan hooker one. The other good one.

It's all fun and games until El Gordo calls for the money shot you agreed to take for less than the cost of a supreme chalupa. Today is the day you reflect on life.

Butthole sex is a fun way to kink up your social life. Sometimes...

The only foreplay this full fledges pornstar needs is the sound of a zipper.Teasing doesn't last long with this chick either because it's always her that rips into it first.

Watch as this innocent little girl gets lured into a video that can never be deleted off the face of the Internet with nothing more than sticky tits to show for it.

Consider your penis officially taken hostage if it ever gets the chance to play hide and seek between those thighs.

Mom and Dad aren't going to be proud but we sure as fuck are. But we should probably tell her that girls who really care about their futures do it up the butt.

Can't deny the beauty on this one. Plus her whole inquisitive personality means she'll believe you when you say the butthole penetration was 'accidental'.

Sweetness on the surface, and just as sticky on the inside thanks to this guy making an unannounced deposit into her vaginal canal. I don't think she's happy.

Gotta love the gusto of a blonde girl. Statistically speaking they are less likely to stab you in the face if you blow a load inside them. Always remember that.

Oh she wants the D alright. Which is a disgrace to her entire family since they strive so hard to make sure she got A's. YOU DISHONOR WHOLE FAMIRY.

She may be accepting a cunt plugging from a total stranger, but there's much worse things in life. Like texting while driving, or Ellen Degeneres for example.

Ditzy blonde with a pair of hangers you'd skin your own cat alive for just to get a lick, takes the D exactly like you'd expected her to. With a fucking smile.

And that was before he turned her orifices until a penile playground and marked his territory on her face. She must've been one of the popular ones in school.

Take a good, hard look at that face in the thumbnail. That's the expression of a girl who knows what it takes to be popular and is willing to put the work in.

Of course, the freshest girl in this town could mean she's yet to do a 30 man gangbang. A good standard to have when dating girls in the New Jersey area.

That couch has seen more than it's fair share of gutter slut, trailer trash, redneck-squeezed vaginal juices in it's lifetime. We consider this one an upgrade.

And they're willing to go balls to the wall for the right price. Just ask Ronnie - her going rate is 2 pick up lines from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and a fake promise.

If there's a boundary, barrier or wall a girl with Spanish blood in her can't cross we haven't seen it yet. Warning: she might become a personal favorite.

Woodman himself would have shat his pants.